Who Should I Tell About My Estate Plan?
Creating an estate plan is a powerful step toward protecting your loved ones and your legacy — but once your plan is complete, a crucial question remains: who should you share it with? Sharing your estate plan wisely ensures your wishes are carried out smoothly and reduces confusion or conflict later. Here’s a guide to deciding who needs to know what — and how much to share.
1. Your Spouse or Partner
Your spouse or long-term partner should always be aware of your estate plan. They’ll likely be the first person responsible for carrying out your wishes — from financial management to health care decisions.
Tip: Review your plan together every few years. This ensures both of you understand how assets are titled, where documents are stored, and what steps to take in case of incapacity or death.
2. Your Chosen Executor or Trustee
If you’ve named someone to manage your estate or trust, make sure they know they’ve been chosen — and where to find your documents.
Executors often have to act quickly, so they must have access to key items like:
The original will or trust
A list of financial accounts and property
Contact details for your attorney, accountant, or financial advisor
3. Your Children or Heirs
This one depends on your family dynamic. While you don’t need to share every financial detail, giving your children (especially adult ones) a general understanding can prevent surprises and disputes later.
Explain:
That you have a plan in place
Who is in charge of carrying it out
Your reasoning behind any unequal inheritances or special provisions
Transparent communication can ease emotional strain and reduce conflict.
4. Your Health Care Agent and Financial Power of Attorney
The individuals named in your advance directive and durable power of attorney should know their roles and responsibilities ahead of time.
For instance, your health care agent needs to understand your values and preferences for medical care — not just have the paperwork. A short, honest conversation can make a huge difference when difficult decisions arise.
5. Your Attorney and Financial Professionals
Your estate planning attorney, CPA, and financial advisor should all be aware of your plan’s key components. Coordination among them helps prevent tax issues, conflicting beneficiary designations, or administrative delays when the time comes.
6. A Trusted Friend or Backup Contact
Sometimes, the people you trust most aren’t family. If you have a close friend, sibling, or advisor who isn’t directly involved but knows where to find your documents, it can serve as an extra safeguard in emergencies.
How Much Should You Share?
You don’t have to share every dollar amount or account detail. The key is that the right people have access to the right information — enough to carry out your wishes efficiently and respectfully.
Keep a summary letter or estate planning binder that includes:
The location of your will or trust
Contact info for your legal and financial team
Key account and insurance details
Instructions for digital assets (emails, online banking, social media)
Final Thought
Estate planning is about more than documents — it’s about connection, clarity, and care. The more thoughtfully you communicate your plan, the more peace you create for the people you love.